Tips from the Trenches: A Guide to Practical Parenting

1. They know how to say "no". Pleasing is not a top priority so they always get to accomplish all the things on their lists: drawing on the walls, playing in the dirt, running around screaming, etc.
2. They know what they like. (Even if it changes from second to second.)
3. They know when to act like they love you. (Call it self-preservation if you must, but it is effective and pretty darn cute, too.)