Monday, November 16, 2009
My daughter is going through yet another "phase". It is a multi-faceted campaign designed at total parent annihilation.We are now in week 3 of the campaign and I think it might be working. The strategy is as follows:

  • From 7 am to 7 pm, make unreasonable demands such as hiding a pacifier and then asking Mommy to find it. An especially annoying variation is to hide the pacifier behind back while screaming for Mommy to "Find It!" Or, cry dramatically while asking for something unintelligibly. 
  • From 7 pm to 7 am, wake up Mommy by screaming that I'm cold, can't find my paci, want my light on, or some other ridiculous ruse at a minimum rate of three times per night.
  • Throw tantrums at a minimum of every 36 hours. Day or night. 
  • Refuse to eat. Period.
  • Refuse to bathe and, if made to bathe, have a tantrum over putting feet on bathmat.
  • Refuse to brush hair.
  • Refuse to cooperate for diaper changes, but refuse to wear underpants.
  • Perfect the pout, the scream, the "You're stupid", and the "I hate you, Mommy!"
The only thing I'm getting out of this is some good fodder for my getting paid-to-write job, but it is sooooo not worth it.


Anna said...

Wow, really? She looks so angelic....

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