Tips from the Trenches: A Guide to Practical Parenting

Depressing, but true. Turns out I was WAY off on the sock poll. Substantially more participants surveyed (a shocking 83%)  thought that it was more important for socks to be clean on the outside than on the inside.

Since I was the only person who voted for "clean on the inside", it appears I'm in the need of a major paradigm shift in my "beauty's only skin deep" philosophy. Crap...I guess it's time to start showering at the beginning of the day. (Or just make a bunch of new friends...that might be easier, actually.)

Forget WD40. Here are some ways to use your favorite cooking spray for more than cooking. I prefer PAM original flavor because the smell of the olive oil one is too strong.

• To remove rust
• To get gum out of hair
• To untangle knots in hair
• To lubricate stuck parts on disused tools, such as wrenches
• To treat the hinge on a squeaky door
• To remove wax (crayon) from smooth surfaces
• To unstick items stuck in locks (both keys and food products, such as gum)
• To soften extremely dry patches of skin or to prevent chapping
• To remove stickers from windows
• To remove Bandaids from skin

Let me know if you know any other off-label uses.

As I was cruising the isles at Target the other day, I stumbled upon this little pearl of brilliance...

Small enough to pop in the diaper bag or glove box. Convenient enough for the stressed-out parents' quick fix...wine boxes. The only thing it doesn't come with is a straw! (Don't worry, I already e-mailed Target about that oversight. I think it will be fixed on the next production run.)

The other thing I don't understand was that I couldn't find it in the baby products isle.

Interesting question though, do you think the wine is packaged by Juicy Juice? Bet that was an interesting meeting to go to.

For a while now, I've been having this conversation regularly.

CHILD: Who's coming?
ME: No one. I can't hear you very well though. I'm vacuuming.

I finally had the conversation in enough details that I figured out what the heck is going on. (Yes, I'm a little slow.)

ME: I'm going to tidy up you room.
DAUGHTER: My animals?
ME: Yes.
DAUGHTER: My books?
ME: Yes.
DAUGHTER: My ponies?
ME: Yes.
DAUGHTER: Even the big ones?
ME: Yes.

Pause.

DAUGHTER: Who's coming?
ME: No one.
DAUGHTER: (disappointed) Oh.

(Insert the Ah-ha! moment here.)

ME: What!? Do you think that every time I clean someone is coming over?
DAUGHTER: Yes.

Some people can be so stupid.

Don't forget to vote in my sock poll on the right.

The juice box is for scale.

Since I've been tossing tips left and right these days (well, at least once to the left right left right left), I thought I would delve in to a problem I alluded to on Facebook not so long ago. I really thought I might be able to get a straight answer for once, but not a single person took a stand to help me out. Shocking as that may be to most of you, I've decided to try again.

Due to the sheer quantity of laundry that I have to do, it should go without saying that I have no desire to make the job bigger than it already is. We all know how much I love the topic of laundry and I have an honest to God laundry dilemma. So here goes...it's about socks.

I hate the fact that socks are an item if clothing that only gets clean on one side. And that is at best, really, because most of the socks I wash are already balled up to such a degree that I'm pretty sure no water actually penetrates the dirty, stinky, knotted lump that is tossed with nary a care in to the machine. Socks are dirty from both the feet in them and the environment around them. Pretty disgusting really.

So what do I do? I want to wash my socks according to some reasonable standard that I can feel confident represents the average laundry aficionado's efforts. I don't want my kids to be any dirty (or any cleaner really 'cause that's just too much work) than the kids sitting next to them in class.

I will not wash them twice. Nor will I bleach them every time I put wash them. Half the time they are stuck down the leg of some one's jeans anyway.

What I want to know is...is it more important that socks are clean on the inside or on the outside?

To answer this question, I'm posting a poll and asking you to vote. If you have extra tips, you are also welcome to post them in the comments as always. At the end of the week, where the votes were cast and will (probably) just do that.

Please note that all votes are anonymous (unless you make a comment, of course). Let me know what you think. Go ahead, sock it to me...(sorry, couldn't resist).