Sunday, March 29, 2009

Monday, Monday...Monday morning gave me no warning of how it would be...

UGH! That about says it all, but let me break it down for you. Just for fun.

6:30 Wake-up to the sounds of "Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!"
6:31 Brush teeth and go to the bathroom simultaneously to the sounds of "Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!"
6:33 Answer the call.
6:33:30 Find a leaky diaper, a soaked child, and a soaked bed
6:34 Handle the aforementioned items...blach!
6:35 Redress and rediaper child screaming "No diaper! Naked!"
6:36 Lose battle
6:37 Greet other child to the sound of "Mommy, I'm hungry. Mommy, look. This is a clone trooper and this is another clone trooper. And this is a gun that shoots purple lasers. Mommy, can I have milk and a cereal bar. Mommy, look...this guy's a good guy. This guy just got blown up."
6:38 "Cook" breakfasts for 1 adult, 1 Kindergartner, and 1 toddler to the sound of "Mommy! My milk! I'm hungry!"
6:42 Bribe toddler with blueberries if she gets dressed.
6:45 Make the mistake of giving toddler frozen (organic) blueberries for breakfast.
6:46 Eat (e.g. shovel in) own breakfast as blueberry covered daughter climbs in my lap for her share.
6:47 Pour hot tea over my arm and leg to the sounds of "Mommy, more milk, please. Mommy, can I have a pastry? Mommy, this DVD isn't working."
6:48 Gather Kindergartner's clothes together and ask him to get dressed.
6:55 Smell something foul.
6:56 Change nastiest diaper even known.
7:00 Change toddlers clothes. Outfit 2. Fight 2.
7:10 "More blueberries, Mama!" (Mama is used for variety, but the impact is the same.)
7:12 Deliver more blueberries.
7:15 Deliver more blueberries.
7:16 Tell Kindergartner to get dressed or he will be going to school in pajamas. (Turns out this is not a big threat to a garden variety Kindergartner.)
7:20 Wipe blueberry covered face and hands with minimum success.
7:21 Wipe blueberry hand prints from wall with no success.
7:23 Dress Kindergartner. Ask him to put on his own socks and shoes.
7:29 Advise children that I'm getting dressed.
7:31 Attempt to locate public-safe clothes while husband is trying to sleep because he's on the night shift this week.
7:32 Yell to the kids to "STOP FIGHTING!"
7:33 Locate clothes and dress.
7:35 Put Kindergartner's coat on and place his backpack by the door.
7:38 Put unhappy toddler with new layer of blueberries in stroller.
7:40 Put on horrible, bright yellow Crocs and brown dowdy coat.
7:40:45 Push stroller out door.
7:41 Get to elevator. Toddler pushes button! Mommy realizes that Kindergartner has left his backpack next to the door. Advises Kindergartner to get backpack FAST!
7:42 Elevator arrives.
7:42:15 Kindergartner arrives with backpack. No shoes.
7:42:16 Elevator leaves.
7:44 Kindergartner brings shoes to elevator and button is pushed again.
7:50 Elevator arrives.
7:50:05 Board elevator as doors close on crappy, yellow Crocs.
7:50:30 Arrive relatively unscathed on "E". Exit elevator and proceed QUICKLY to school.
7:55 Hear school bell.
7:56 Arrive at school.
8:15 Arrive home (toddler wanted to walk).
8:16 Realize shirt has hole in very inappropriate location and sweatpants could safely be called crotchless. Turns out they weren't public clothes after all.
8:17 Hope the day improves as toddler begins her first temper tantrum of the day.
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4 comments:

Anna said...

So, basically just an ordinary day, right?

March 29, 2009 at 10:50 PM
Helen said...

Well, except for the blueberries. Note to self: Save blueberries for pre-bath snack.

March 30, 2009 at 2:04 AM
Rosemary said...

Boy, are we on the same page today! I am just about to post about my Monday. I would love a comment and reciprocal link to http://writingmilitarymom.blogspot.com. I actually found you through feedjit, something new I put on my blog.

Let me know. Putting you on my follow list now.

Have a better day! I will try, too. :)

Rosemary
Writing Military Mom
writingmilitarymom.blogspot.com

March 30, 2009 at 12:17 PM
Helen said...

I put a static link to you a while ago when I first came upon your blog. Glad you found me.

March 30, 2009 at 6:08 PM

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