Tips from the Trenches: A Guide to Practical Parenting

Twix candy bars are currently an important snack in our house. Because they are popular, we usually have a good stock of Twix so everyone has enough to share without argument. (Sort of like needing a good stock of toilet paper, just in case.)

This didn't appear to be the case today when Jack decided it was time for a Twix Fix. Usually the Twix package contains 2 sticks of chocolate covered caramel and cookie, but this time the Twix was partially eaten (by the babysitter) the night before. She had broken off half of a stick and left the rest neatly wrapped on the counter. Not only that, but it was the last Twix in the house. A fight or flight mentality was starting to take hold...the kids were gonna fight and I was outta there!

When Emma saw Jack come in the room with a Twix, she decided it was time for her Twix Fix, too. I told Jack that it was the last Twix and that he needed to share it with Emma. He paused, looked at the open package, and took the two pieces (one short and one long) out. This is when I saw the problem for the first time.

Now as can be expected Big Brother gave Little Sister the short stick, but Little Sister wasn't having any of that! She instantly passed Jack the short stick and reached for the long stick. There was another moment of pause. I could almost see Jack salivating over the anticipated snack. He really, REALLY wanted it. I felt bad for him (and me) because I knew Emma would fall apart.

Just as I was getting ready to distract Emma from her forthcoming tantrum, Jack handed her the long stick. Tears welling in his eyes and cheeks going red, he took the short stick and started to retreat to his room to gut it out. Just as I was getting ready to give Jack a big hug and tell him he did a good job, Emma yelled "Wait, Jack!" and gave him a big hug and kiss. "Thank you, Jack. That was so nice!" she said. It was a tear jerker, I have to say.

So, you ask, what was the lesson learned? When the stakes are high, you may be surprised at what your children have learned (but NEVER demonstrated).